Inevitable

Goodbyes, heartbreaks, sadness and change, are inevitable.
As much as I hate all of these, it will still happen.
Time and time again I try to push myself away from people so that I will not feel this way, but You have proven to me that it is completely fine to trust in all of these.
Yes I don't like to feel this way, but to advance to a higher level, this must happen.

Moving on to a greater and fresher start... Firmly believe that You have greater plans in stored.

My heart and my soul yearns for some glimmer of hope in a certain situation, but yet time again I am just faced with a fact that the outcome will always be the same.
I don't want to feel this way! But the results never fail to disappoint me...
Thinking of what will happen to me in the future, I don't want to have a hardened heart...

My mind seems to have a life of its own, though I will try my best not to over think and worry, my mind never fails to lead me there.
I don't want to think bout it...

Desperately in need of someone whom I can just talk to, someone who will just listen... And let me pour my heart out without judging or giving comments...
Right now I just need someone to listen to, feeling like there's so many things in my heart though there isn't...

How bad do I want this?

The reason for me being so successful a few years back was because I would question myself on a daily, if not hourly about how bad and how much do I want this?
I would always ask myself, how bad do I want this? What am I willing to sacrifice for it? What would I do before I can achieve it?

Now looking back, I pray and wish that I will have that mentality and continue to question myself this on a daily basis.
Motivation does not come to you, you look for the motivation to keep you going. And here I am pushing hard to get that motivation and drive again, in all the aspects of my life..

Be it in ministry, studies, family and dancing, how much am I willing to sacrifice for it?
I want to be able to look back and know that I have done my best, to know that I want that so badly.

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Was just reading a book just now, and the main character suffered a lot but in the end, she managed to graduate with a full degree of dance choreography. Though this is just some fictional story, I would definitely wish that I am able to reach such a level.
With all these things surfacing in my life showing how I want this, I need to get my butt off lazing around.
With hard work and pain, I can achieve what I want...

On a random note, I find it completely normal and I actually love it when I perspire during dance, but I absolutely hate it when I perspire doing something else. Walking, running, standing under the sun etc...
I love the tiredness of my body, the muscle aches I feel and the blisters that never fail to form under my feet.
Proves to show how hard I am pushing myself.
Now is the time to apply this in my studies.

Looking 7 months ahead, I will NOT regret this.
How bad do I want this?

We can watch the sunrise

Why am I not surprise with the things that are happening now?

Was thinking bout everything last night and I guess we are at a stage 4 or 5...
Somewhere somehow I guess one of us stopped trying.
Will still and am still trying, I'm not gonna let this just fall.

Of all the things that are happening, I cannot believe that the things I thought would never happen is happening now...
At times I ask myself why is this happening? Yet at times I am thankful that this is happening...

Still trying to swallow the lump in my throat

I will be rising from the ground like a skyscraper

Why do we pretend nothing is wrong when EVERYTHING is wrong?
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Time to be real...
I guess somehow, somewhere along the way I've changed.
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Help me, save us, save me.

Close your precious eyes and just realize I'm still fighting

I am...
Anticipating many awesome things coming soon this year.
The future has been pretty much set. Church, family time, getting over with O's and dancing.

I find it such a joke to look at myself from a different point of view.
Imagining myself, seeing a physical me doing the things I do. I tell myself, Study hard, yet here I am wasting my time...
Looking at Me through my eyes, am I happy with what I am?
Guess it's not up to me to decide.

A year before, I still remembered what i did. Thank You for that..... Am advancing to yet another level. Be strong Eugenia.

I don't want to wake up and find, that I let another year go by, wasted.

I thought I was ready to bleed.

I just had the time of my life a few days back. Dancing in yet a whole new level.
Dancing for the audience of One. Wow that is just an honor for me and such a blessing and joy!
Hope Conf just brought me to a new level.
I guess this is time for me to get to know myself better. I feel that people know me better than I know myself...


For all the joy and happiness, it must obviously come to an end. Though my heart is still praying that studies can wait,
I'm still hoping with a fragile heart that my studies will have a 180 degree transformation. Still staying positive knowing that all good things come to those who wait on Him...

Just a short reminder to myself: please rest. Take time to think and renew myself.
Am keeping a fighting spirit knowing that above all these situations, You are still watching me, looking after me.


I know for sure that my future is in Your hands.

Hoping with an eager heart

To those whose hope is gone, I hope this will change you and find your hope in Him again...

The future

I've been thinking bout my past recently...
It amazes me to know and realise how much I've changed in a sport span of... a year!?
Who I was in the past, who I am now, who I will be in the future...
Wow, it amazes me to know how time changes everything.
Looking back at last year, the things I've been through, the things that made me happy and sad, the things I have achieved makes me so excited.
Excited to know that from then on, I will be an even better person.
Time changes everything. Praying that it will mould and shape me to be an even better person.
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When I look back next year to this time, I want to feel a sense of achievement, knowing that I've been through even tougher situations, and knowing that I have conquered all things thru Him.
Shaping my future now... Whatever that I am feeling now will be useful next time.
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Tough times will definitely come, no doubt. But knowing that all You have in store for me is better than one can imagine, makes all the pain, hardship and heavy heart all worth it.
Help me to remember this.
I am only made stronger through You.

Thoughts

I've been thinking....
How much do I want it?
What truly matters?
What is my vision?
What must I do to let all these things come to pass?
How can I do it?
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I am not the most positive and secure person in the world. I do have my moments too. It sucks to feel this way. Help me to overcome this...
I know I am capable of doing this and I know I will get through from these things.
Heavy-hearted, pressed. But not crushed. Not destroyed. Not abandoned. I can do this!
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Im still holding on because I know everything will turn out just fine.

You know you are a dancer when...

"When you hear music and you make up dance to it in your head."
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"When you relate everything to dance."
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"When a new leotard makes your day."
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"When you're invited to somewhere and your response is 'I can't, I have dance.' "
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"When any pain is good pain."
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"When you have blisters on your feet for life."
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"When you dance down the hallway instead of walk."
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"When 'Practice makes perfect' isn't just a saying, but a way of life."
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Point of difference

The mid-years are round the corner and I am her blogging.......
Nah, im rushing out my coursework and the same cycle keeps on going around every year.
Anyway, I had an awesome cross country this year at Admiralty Park!
Adelene, Doris and I had so much fun!
Headed to Esplanade afterwards to chill and I must say, it's a wonderful place to be in.
It's the only place that supports the arts scene.
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I don't want to regret anything.

THIS....

Is the reason why i still breathe.

When nothing you do could change my mind.

Busy Bee.
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When there's nothing worth fighting for, fight for what you already have.

Greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in the city.

Amidst my troubles, sorrows and pain, I know I can still be hopeful in things that are gonna come.

To stand strong even when you have the rights to fall. Thats being strong.

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Start to focus on whats important.

Good times. Good people.

Candid shot during Fireproof camp! ♥
Cny reunion dinner 2010! ♥

Grad night- Antisocial club! ♥

YOG Opening ceremony! ♥

CNy perf 2011! ♥

Insane days with Adelene and Doris! ♥

After service with VA! ♥

Practice for West xmas party! ♥

VWA group photo! ♥

Cycling LG! ♥

Moments spent with lg! ♥

Velocity! ♥

Group shot during fireproof camp! ♥

Cycling LG! ♥

CNY perf 2010! ♥

Qiuxuan's bday! ♥

Dewen's farewell! ♥

Awards day 2010!
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Chingay 2010! ♥

恭喜发财

Its already February!?
Time passes way too fast :(
Anyway, school has been rather good for now, things are going pretty well for now. My studies are much better than it was before. You know, its the same old same old, every one's saying that we want to go to sec5 only because we really want to, not because someone forced us so you know the pressure's on.
Life has been pretty decent for now, I'm still breathing. So many things to do but there isnt much time, but on a good note, we performed today!!
The feeling of achievement and aniticipation all came much like WHOOOOSSSHHHH.
It was really so so so good!!
Had a great day performing today, followed by lunch with Adelene @ Imm~
hehe, met cristine and natalie afterwards for awhile than reached home and slept for eternity.
So, cheers to a lovely and blessed Chinese New Year for you all!~

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♥

It was only just a dream.

School hasnt been the best for me but there's so many things to be grateful and thankful for so im still thankful for everything that has happened. :)
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Do what you love when no one is watching. Thats when you do it best.